Chapter 1 Excerpt
Laughter Puts Us Intensely in the Moment
" Humor keeps you in the present. It is very difficult to laugh and be disassociated with people around you. In that one moment together you have unity and a new chance." -- Alexis Driscoll
Nathan and Madeleine are a young couple in love. Victoria and Bryan are older but caught in love’s magic nonetheless. It’s somewhat different for them, but not in many ways that matter. After years of serious living, they are loving and laughing once again. They giggle together like school children. Life seems funnier than usual, and their laughter is energizing. What they thought was never-ending fatigue is a memory, and they seem to be riding the crest of a positive wave.
Serious issues are less overwhelming to Bryan and Victoria as they encounter them in a relationship filled with laughter. They are having fun again and feeling great! It’s no wonder we all yearn for what we had in the beginning of our relationships. If nothing else, we were intensely alive.
Both couples feel fully accepted by their partners. Laughter has a lot to do with this feeling. Since laughter creates constant perspective, all the uncomfortable traits of our partners seem both unimportant or entirely bearable. We are even able to convince ourselves they are somehow endearing, and we view them with indulgent affection.
Laughter puts anxiety on a back burner for everyone, but especially for lovers. Because we can’t laugh and worry at the same time, the future seems far away and less consuming. We are focused on the present and wrapped in a single instant in time. Laughter and love happen in the moment, and hurling caution to the winds, we reach out and seize that moment.
When Bryan looks at Victoria, he only sees how much he loves her. When they laugh together, issues that could be areas of conflict seem less important. Laughter opens many possibilities, and solutions seem to appear by magic. Any need to criticize or analyze has lost its appeal.
Victoria looks at Bryan and also sees how much she loves him. Although the world hasn’t changed, she has. She and Bryan laugh over dopey little things like the way his Southern accent sounds over the phone or the way she eats one thing at a time on her plate. Their laughter is almost giddy, and it seems as normal as a cup of coffee to start the day. She snuggles into their relationship, and the world seems far less complicated than before.
When they are together, the many things Bryan and Victoria juggle on a daily basis no longer distract them. They aren’t as frantically focused on work, chores, family, and friends. Love seems to have relaxed them, and laughter puts them fully in the moment. They no longer want to keep trying to do so many things at once. They are not preoccupied with other things. They focus on one another. They now realize that they had lost this sort of clarity in the whirling march of details dominating their lives. It feels fantastic to let go for a while and deal with only one thing.
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